we were never who i thought

words never mean as much as they should.
and people change. or maybe they don't change and i just forgot how to be in love with you.
i saw you for the first time since April 3, and its been nearly 6 months since the last time we were together on purpose. and i forgot your birthday.

together and forever and always and never were rolled off your tongue far too much. they are all big, heavy, weighty, important words full of promise. and you could never keep a promise.

every word you've spoken to me cracked my glass heart just a little more but i never cried. i never cried for you and i really want you to know that.

i don't think you're a bad person. but i think that people grow into different people.
i think we were always different people because you feel God and you dream of going to BYU and of a stay at home wife.

i believe in people, not God.
BYU died to me at age 11.
there are hundreds of other children that need me first.

so we've never aligned. and i spent a long time convincing myself otherwise. because my heart was glass and it caught your reflection and shined it right behind my eyelids whenever i closed my eyes.

i'm happy to not be in love with you anymore. but thanks for the little peak into your heart.