YOUR HEART IS SHOWING

he slid a napkin under the table in china "savanna, you're bleeding"
i cried in england because i had been sad for so long and i thought england was supposed to make me so happy.
paris smelled bad.
i cried on the way home from vegas, but it was dark.

i told my therapist about you.
i'm in the 99th percentile of depression.
that means only one percent of the population is more sad than i am.

i think that one percent is dead.
i'm worried that i'm right behind them.

i told my therapist about them and how i stopped eating and how i just want to make you happy and how much i love you.
he asked me if i was willing to sacrifice yale for you, if i was willing to sacrifice whats left of myself for you.
i said no because i was supposed to.

he says i have a big heart, abnormally large
and i need to find a place in there for myself.

he asked me if there was anyone to take care of me and i said leah does what she can. he said i am so focused on helping other people that i've surrounded myself with broken people so i have no one to save me.