our mortality is all we have

(and i don't know how to tell my mother that i wish i was dead)


i moved my hand to let you see
it didn't slip, 
i moved my hand.

but that was seven strikes from one desperate pitch. 

those x's are turning to scratches in the cement of this room with no doors,
the men outside don't hear a thing.

we took the L today, boys, 
take a knee, 
take two. 
say a prayer. 

oh, god, the eternal father 
why were you so mean to me
why am i so mean to myself?