please don't let me drown

"well i am sorry, you can leave then"

i'm drowning, i'm drowning.
isn't anyone listening, i tried to drown myself.
i let myself fall below the waves, out of the sight of god,
out of the sight of my god.
you called me your angel.

i didn't bring the pills today.
sometimes i do.
i left the blade at home.
sometimes i don't.
because you always need to locate your emergency exits.

this feels like an emergency.